Monday 20 September 2010

Break a Leg..................No Really!

Auditions for an xmas tour of Christmas Carol and Pride and Prejudice. So I'd like to take this opportunity to wish all the actors going for the roles that I want the very worst of luck. None of that 'may the best man win' or 'as long they've got the right guy for the role' bollocks! You're trying to lower my standard of living and furthermore I hate all that false bonhomie 'we're all in this together commardirie'.
It achieves nothing except making me want to die.

Tuesday 7 September 2010

I've started so I probably won't finish.

Always do this. Have a few bevies and start writing. Last night I was a literary giant who was going to sweep aside all pretenders with the genius of my creation and then this morning I read it. Sober.That was my first mistake.
Badly scrawled biro ramblings revealing some frankly disturbing insights into my psyche and a central character that makes Andy Murray appear charasmatic by comparison do not an award winning west end production make.
Anyone got any ideas for a title? Its a sort of cross between Skins and Cannibal Holocaust.

Monday 6 September 2010

The Rear End of a Cow.

Thats basically what I've been playing these past few months. A cow's arse. Finally finished the tour and all I've got to show for it is a bad back and an aversion panto quadrapeds! Now onwards to the Boro and signing on! Joy beyond all possible joys!

P.S. I may well experiment with alcoholisim. Cider probably It seems rather disegenious to poison yourself with anything as classy as Blossom Hill Chardonay.